You Don’t Know What Ya Don’t Know, Ya Know?

You Don’t Know What Ya Don’t Know, Ya Know?

You Don’t Know What Ya Don’t Know, Ya Know?

I have never been a fan of being stagnant. To someone like me, being stale, vapid or simply ordinary is a curse that rivals having no pulse. What I've come to discover, however, is that sometimes you don't know what you don't know. If you are never exposed to the extraordinary, how do you recognize that there can actually be something even more amazing than what you've ever imagined?

We are bound by our own experiences and limited by stifling our expectations based upon only what we think we know. Most recently I have realized that my own personal limitations have been defined by not allowing myself to see beyond what I've only witnessed firsthand. It is the equivalent of not comprehending the vast beauty of the ocean because you've only walked by a creek or a stream.

I can remember a friend of mine from college, when asked if she wanted to try sushi telling me that she "doesn't like seafood." Recognizing that this was a pretty broad statement, I challenged her thinking. How did she come to this conclusion? Her response... "I used to work at Long John Silvers." Really? She simply didn't know any better and I recall feeling kind of sad at her closed minded vision.

I believe that many times in life, you accept your experiences as the gospel and forget to remind yourself that there is, in fact, a great big world out there and that a hatred of seafood shouldn't stem from a summer frying hush puppies. And that if you love the feel of cotton, that cashmere might blow your mind. I just think that we forget. In the hustle and bustle of everyday life, we accept the hand we've been dealt. We start to think that the extraordinary exists only for other people. It is easy to slip into acceptance of the ordinary...or even less sometimes. It's much easier to accept the status quo than to keep searching for that which exists only in our minds, hearts and dreams. But, just as Rhonda Byrne suggests in the book "The Secret", the secret to the law of attraction is that you get what you give, you attract what you expect and everyone's wants needs and desires can be achieved by believing in the outcome. So, what I am suggesting is that by recognizing that there is something more, that there is a more blissful life personally, professionally, socially that you can have experiences far more enriching than you could ever imagine.

Unknown.pngCritics of this theory may say that having no expectations means you are less likely to be disappointed. I beg to differ. While not every experience will be life changing in a mind altering, out of body experience type of way, the ones that are...the ones that raise the bar for what you deserve in your life are worth the ones that might slightly fall short. These epic types of moments, yes, indeed they are the ones worth waiting for. And, in the meantime, realize that every experience has value. You can learn lessons from experiences on each end of the spectrum. And if you recognize that the extraordinary exists, then you are much less likely to settle for less than what could be and you are appreciative for every person, every relationship, every experience because each one brings value, clarity and understanding.

Sometimes, after a lifetime of blurred vision, you get to see clearly. Sometimes a two-dimensional thought process comes alive when considered from a different angle. It may be the difference between seeing a photograph in black and white or witnessing it in color, 1980s television versus high definition, Long John Silvers versus Ahi Tuna Sashimi...you get the idea. All of these things have value, but you don't know what you don't know until you experience it for yourself. And well, then you know, ya know?

I've seen one of those quote-y picture things floating around the Internet thatUnknown-1.pngsays sometimes you have to forget what you want and remember what you deserve. While I agree with this sentiment, sometimes what we want (or what we settle for) is far less than what could be because we simply don't even know what is out there. And until you're open to it...you don't even realize what you deserve. I'm still learning this, and every time I discover something that I didn't think possible, and every time I look at things just a bit differently, and right after I am amazed that something that wonderful, that different, that amazing just happened (to me!) I am thankful and blessed and happy to see the bar raised just a slight bit higher in my life.

Comments to this blog can be directed to carrie@bordaslaw.com.