I AM OUTRAGED!!!!
Has a story ever outraged you and then suddenly you find life has moved along; then there it is -- a reminder about that story that prompts you to remember it years later? Whatever happened? Did it just disappear?
A story that struck a chord for me of complete outrage was the story of the Tennessee woman who sent her adopted son back to Russia in 2010.
WHAT????
So, other than being ordered to pay child support to Russia, where is this Torry Hansen today? Better yet, where is this little boy?
As a mother of a beautiful little girl that I was blessed and I stress "BLESSED" to adopt, I cannot even fathom this act of callousness.
As a refresher to those who know of the story and for those who do not, a small boy was adopted from a Russian orphanage and after only six months, once his Tennessee family could no longer sacrifice their lives or resources for this boy, they put him on a plane back to Moscow; alone for an annulment of this adoption. He didn't even speak Russian nor did he know anyone!
WHY????
The family claimed they feared for their safety after severalviolent episodes from this 7-year-old child, including fear for their lives. The adoptive family claimed mental instability of the child and that they were misled.
Why might I bring this up? I guess because as we are going into the fall and winter seasons and the holidays are approaching soon, it makes me think about all the little children and young adults who have no families to call their own. And the holidays hit me hard with this feeling of compassion. Can you imagine not feeling loved or knowing that you could be completely dismissed if you didn't walk a fine line in every aspect of your life?
I understand the fear. I understand the concern and I empathize with that, but you don't toss away a human life. This was inexcusable.
Adoption. Unconditional love. Unconditional means not limited. It is complete and absolute.
Adoption of a child is not mulling over the purchase of the latest model vehicle on the market or the fad to try to be like the Hollywood stars, these are real lives of innocent children that came into this world asking for nothing, just wanting to be lovedand accepted.
No. It is not a storybook life. I would venture to say that if it is for you, then you are one of the few and I guess lucky ones.
Let's face it, our own biological children can have physical or mental disabilities that leave strain on marriages, stress in the home and financial deficit that you wish would have been avoided, but where would you send them if you felt you exhausted of all your resources? You wouldn't send them anywhere. Somehow, you'd find another resource and although you may never find the answer, you'd never quit.
Odds are if a child is adopted even in infancy, you are probably going to have to face concerns you never imagined even if you were as prepared as you thought you could be.
How can we help? What do you do? How and why does it get to be different because someone is adopted? It shouldn't be that way. Part of adoption is fighting for a child and giving them your infinite love no matter what it is. Don't give up. Stand by your word, find resources, respite services, or whatever it takes,but please never do something as ghastly as this Tennessee family.
Perhaps there is a reader out there that is considering helping a child in our foster care system or an independent or international adoption, please prepare. Please give of your whole self. It will be the most selfless act you can do in this world if you commit and don't look back with regret.
As we go into the fall and winter, maybe you would consider helping a child waiting a forever family or a family already helping a child that could use some strength and reinforcement. What's that saying? "It takes a village to raise a child."
For more information, please contact one of my favorite local services, the National Youth Advocate Program right here in Wheeling, located on National Road, whether you want information on helping a child, becoming a respite worker or making a donation. Children are placed in their care daily. Clothing, toys, anything you can imagine for children of all ages is always needed. Protect our children and make a difference right here in our own community today.
